elder riley harper: COMING HOME - IT'S MIXED FEELINGS

RILEY SAYING FAREWELL TO LA FAMILIA IGLESIAS IN MONTE AGUILA

Commentary from Riley's Mom - Abbie received this letter from Riley a few weeks ago. Tom and I thought you might like to read it. He gives a great description of his feelings about coming home.

(Coming home) It's mixed feelings. I'm way excited to come home to see all of you guys again and to start another chapter of my life with all I've learned here; it excites me. But at the same time I'm really scared to leave the mission. Out here in the mission we are right smack dab in the world. In big cities in small towns. Talking to rich people poor people. Laughing with the people through happy moments, crying with them through sad ones. Heck, we talk to them in their streets and even enter their houses!!! We learn the streets of where they live better than they could with ten years living there and I'd even go as far to say that we are in so much contact with them in all walks of life that we know the Chileans and how they live better than they know themselves. However, despite being submerged in this world, we truly are not of this world.

We are aliens!!! and not just because we are gringos jaja. We literally live in a fake world!!! Well it's not fake but it's not reality! We get the weird opportunity to live outside of reality for two years!!! Our food is handed to us, money is handed to us (not a lot but enough to buy bus tickets cookies and top ramen) our houses are handed to us and we don't have to worry about work, education or social relationships (besides with investigators). Yeah sure numbers, investigators, broken showers and cut electricity due to unpaid bills can stress at times but it's still not really reality.

I'm kind of rambling but it's weird. The best part of it all is that we are spiritually incubated from the world. Of course you can still fall but it's a lot harder to fall and lose yourself than in the real world. We talk about God, read about God, and think about the gospel almost 24 seven. It's awesome!!!! The point that I'm trying to get to is that even though I'm excited to come home, I'm scared. I'm scared to go back into the real world and I'm scared to leave the incubator spiritually. My life was good before, but I think about my perspective before, how I thought, how I felt, my testimony... and I do not ever want to go back to that. I wasn't a bad kid before but I just don't want to lose anything that I've gained. I know that it's inevitable, I'll hit a ceiling and my spirituality will go down a bit and it's kind of a sad thought. I don't know. I guess it scares me to see if I'm strong enough to keep the habits I've made and perspective I've gained. I mean it's not like I'm a spiritual glowing saint; I still have lots of flaws and defects and am not a perfect missionary, but I'm way farther ahead than from where I started. And I don't want to lose ground that I've gained or get my priorities mixed up. Dominating the natural man is a constant battle. Plus change is scary. But I'm ready I guess. Jaja Well that is definitely enough rambling for today Abbie. Love you lots and hope to hear from you soon.